I always seem to be tripping myself. Yet I'm also always competing with myself. Well I guess not myself really, but other expectations of me. I'm supposed to be straight A, college bound, future changer of the world. At least according to my Mom. I'm not sure if that is me anymore though. You see, I've grown up a lot over the summer. Like I said before, I don't act and think like a 14 year old girl. I never have really.
Anyways, back to tripping myself, I have a lot of fears. A fear of speaking my mind, even though I have a big opinion. A fear of asking for help. A horrible fear of failing, and not being good enough. A fear of my GPA slipping, or a B finding it's way onto my report card. I'm afraid of letting go, and being the person I want to be, instead of the "pleasing everyone" kind of girl I am.
I wrote a song yesterday. On the front steps of a church two blocks from my house. I got upset and stormed off. Before i knew it I had a verse and a chorus. Picture a really rocked up tempo in your head.
Whenever I rise above the ground
I always feel myself crashing down
It's this stupid law of physics
That requires a lot of doctors visits
One moment I'm soaring to great heights,
The next I gotta get up and fight
Just once I'd like life to be,
Zero Gravity
Oh
Zero gravity
I'll always wonder as I wander,
But in my heart,
The thought grows fonder
Oh How I wish my life could be,
Zero Gravity
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